NROP: “Do not ask who I am.” – Identity in the age of fluidity.

It is my belief that we want to be happy, and we want others to be happy. The problem arises when others are happy, but we are not. Then, we become jealous and bitter. Usually, though, if it does not impede our lives too much, we do not want others to suffer. We want them to be happy. We do not want them to have problems. (I am generalizing, since some people, like psychopaths, might not want any of that.) While such an approach is very noble, it can be blinding at times.

Sometimes our intentions are pure at heart, and we just want to help others. Other times, we feel guilty about something, so we try to repent for our sins by helping others. Again, that is an amazing thing. We, as humans, need compassion. However, as much as we want to make other people’s lives easier, we need to think and remind ourselves that there can be unwanted consequences to our kind actions.

Analyzing things is what I like to do in my past time. Especially when it comes to things that surround me and impact me on a daily basis. In the past couple of days, I have been reminded that it is much harder to think of ALL the potential consequences than I thought. It might be because once I see a single fault in the plan, I do not go looking for more issues with it. I just scrap it and search for a new one that would be better. Unfortunately, there is not always a solution that has only positive effects on the world. I am aware of that, and I have to admit that it is something that I obsess about sometimes.

Implementing a solution that causes problems is a controversial one. There are people who voice their opinion against it, and there are people who ask: “Do you have a better idea?”. The answer often is: “No”. But does that disqualify the arguments against the case? I certainly do not think so. We often rush into finding a solution, because we want to fix a problem. What we fail to realize is that the faulty solution can cause more problems, which could be even greater than the original one.

They say: “Don’t judge a book by its cover”, but we all do exactly that. While some years ago, one could look at another human being and make a few accurate assumptions, the same is not so easy today. It is a lot more difficult to distinguish if some people are biologically male, or female. It is a complete guess as to whether they prefer the he, she, or ze pronoun.

Today, I choose to talk about a sensitive topic of identity fluidity.

What is going on in the news? Well, you know how when you are booking a plane ticket you have to choose whether you are a male or a female? Now, in order to be more inclusive, certain airlines decided to add two more options so that some people would not feel left out. Aside from M(ale) and F(emale), there will also be U(ndisclosed) and X to stand for “unspecified”. Among the Mr./ Mrs./ Ms. options, you will soon find “Mx”. How do you pronounce that? Would it be “Max”? How would it make a larger person feel to be called a max? When I read that, all sorts of alarm bells went off in my head.

There was a time when booking an airplane ticket did not require as much information as it does now. Do you know why? 9/11. By providing certain facts about yourself, you help the TSA keep you safe. They pre-screen everyone on the flight list to make sure that people who might pose danger do not get on. However, the National Center for Transgender Equality, calls these TSA measures “intrusive“. They argue that transgender people face “unnecessary, invasive, and discriminatory scrutiny“. Excuse me, but when it comes to my safety, nothing is unnecessary.

Imagine checking in at the airport. Or going through border patrol checkpoint. The airline employee/ officer looks at your passport, then at you, then at your passport again, and then… they let you go, only because they had no clue what to do with you. You did not look like your passport photo from a few years back. You chose not to disclose your gender. You wanted to be referred to as “Cher”. Otherwise, had they questioned your identity, you would threaten to sue them while recording the whole situation and posting the video on social media.

Picture Osama bin Laden at the airport cussing up a storm, because he is being discriminated against. Surely all Arabs must look like terrorists to the white, male, privileged TSA worker. Also, Osama identifies as a girl now, so (s)he cannot be that terrorist everyone is looking for. (Yes, I am aware that he is no longer alive.)

Identity theft has been happening for years. Identity fluidity or not. Recently, when applying for a job, a woman in Florida learned that she had a criminal record. Only she did not. It turned out to be her estranged sister, who was charged with prostitution, who used her identity. It is unclear whether the older sister used a fake ID, or if she had none on her person, and just provided the false information verbally to the arresting officers. It was not easy for the younger sibling to clear her name, as the court required proof of her not being where and when the arrests took place.

A man in Tennessee got caught red-handed when he tried to use a stolen debit card. The owner of the bar the guy tried to pay at, said that he was CLEARLY not whom he was trying to impersonate. When I read that, I shuddered, fearing a lawsuit was coming the bar’s way, because they “discriminated”. However, what really happened was that the bar got an alert that it was a stolen card once it was used. Because of that, an ID was requested, in order to exhaust all avenues and ensure that it was an imposter. The identity thief looked nothing like the person on the stolen ID. Can you imagine if he just threw a fit and cried discrimination? Other patrons filming the situation and it going viral? How much hate would the bar get? Just because they were suspicious?

There already are bad people out in the world. And now, while trying to make some people feel more included, you give other people the tools to do evil in an easier way.

When considering your opinion about gender fluid/ transgender people, have you thought of the effects it would have on flight safety?

What do you think is the future of airport security?

Do you think about ALL possible consequences when considering a solution, or is it enough for it to fix your immediate problem?

Stay golden,



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53 thoughts on “NROP: “Do not ask who I am.” – Identity in the age of fluidity.

Add yours

  1. Women in abaya’s don’t have to go through the same screening process. What a mixed-up world we live in! I still remember boarding a plane by going directly to the gate with my family. You could pay cash for a ticket and your family would walk you to the plane. Hijackings started during the Cuban airlift because there was easy access to the pilot area and there were no guards with guns ensuring passenger safety.

    When I saw “Mx.” my first thought was: Mixed-up. While the world dies around us, and overpopulation is just one “Spanish flu” away from a major culling-by-disease, we are, without a doubt, straining at a gnat while swallowing a camel.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I had to google what an abaya is. Thanks for teaching me something new.

      Indeed. Having the experience from THEN, and comparing it to NOW is like night and day. Impossible to phantom for some that airports have not always been nightmares.

      Mixed-up! Ha! Well done.
      I like your take on the “Book of Revelations”.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. So, gender fluidity. Have you heard of “theybies”? It is what some parents are doing with their own children. Not assigning a gender. On one hand, I can understand their ambiguity, however, on the other hand… If a person doesn’t have an identity from the minute they are born, I think has the potential to cause even more unseen problems for that person later on in life.

    If a grown person wants to be fluid, then why can’t we all then? That’s the elephant in the room if you will.

    If merely changing an identity is all that is required to absolve every person of responsibility, then what is the purpose of laws then?

    Take “Caitlyn” Jenner. Totally absolved from killing people in a car crash when he was identified as Bruce.

    If we can shirk responsibility as easily as claiming a new identity. Then why not?

    You see though, this new rule doesn’t apply to everyone equally. And as we already know, if it ain’t equal, then it ain’t moral. Then again, when have laws ever been moral?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. “TheyWHAT”? I didn’t know that’s how they call them, but I have heard of people not choosing anything (gender, or religion) for their kids. This is very selfish and shortsighted. They might say that they are letting the kid decide, but the truth is that they are doing everything they can to shift any potential future blame onto someone other than themselves. And the second point, like you mentioned, is a cardinal one – the poor kid will know NOTHING. They will be lost and confused.

      I keep telling people I identify as a zebra, but they either laugh, or curse at me. Weird.

      An interesting point you raise about the sins being attached to identities. Not only Bruce is absolved, but also Caitlyn is a hero…

      I don’t think equal things are always moral.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. hmmm, another sensitive topic.Solutions that causes more problem…. i’d say nothing is perfect. sometimes you just have to choose between two evils.
    On the boarding planes side, i’m an arab, a muslim, and a pwd – i’m blind – when i travel alone, i bypass all security checkpoints on the side, with minimal fussing (accompanied by airport pa). But when i’m traveling with a family member, people give me the stinky eye and act like they believe i’m faking needing assistence.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sensitive topics are what I’m all about.
      I agree that coming up with a perfect solution isn’t always possible. But who gets to decide which one is the lesser evil?

      I’m glad to hear that you are being assisted accordingly. However, I personally know people who have greatly exaggerated their disability (or even manufactured it all together) just to have it easier at the airport. It makes me mad, because that is why the people who really need assistance get the stink eyes.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Yeah, i had a blind friend from the U.S who took her dog everywhere, even in airplanes. He was quiet, trained, and would simply sit and wait for the flight to be over. And then one day she told me there was a debate on banning dogs from coming into the plane because they were disturbing others – barking, not obeying orders to sit and so on – they weren’t of course pas to people with disabilities or even trained enough.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Exactly.
          The “emotional support animal” title gets abused a lot. A personally know people who took their tiny dog on board with them, and the whole plane had to suffer, because the dog squealed the whole time. Poor dog.

          Liked by 1 person

  4. We were once going to through the passport control.
    There were 2 queues.
    “Let’s take this one”, I said.
    “Why”, asked Jasper, “this queue is must shorter”.
    “Just trust me”, I said.

    Shorter doesn’t mean faster.
    I recognised all the “exotic” looking people in the short queue. But they would have to answer more questions than the Western European ones.
    And indeed, the longer queue was way faster.

    I haven’t considered flight safety and transgender. Definitely could cause problems.

    I know I should say this, but I am against all this gender change.
    By all means I wish I was a man, because bra’s, montly parties and bad hair days.
    But do I feel like a man? NO.
    How should I know how a man feels?!?!?!
    Do I feel like a woman?
    I don’t know. How is a woman supposed to feel?!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Looks like you are more experienced in travelling than Jasper. I also avoid any lines with kids. And people who look like they will have a lot of technology.

      You raise a valid point regarding “feeling”. We don’t live in times when women had to always wear dresses. Women can wear pants now, and wear their hair short. It is OK for men to have longer hair, and wear pink shirts. Which means that in a way, we can adjust who we are, without having to change crucial parts (body parts).

      Many people seem to be confused. Just because they don’t like something related to their stereotypical gender, they think they have to be the opposite. And I think some people are realizing that. That’s why they claim to be “something else”, other than male/ female.


  5. I’m not sure why things have to be this wacky complicated and soon it’ll probably stop. There must be a way to have a universal ID based upon a fingerprint to use for everything from a driver’s license to a credit card to a passport to Twitter to whatever. Once that happens, all this BS and ID theft will stop and no one needs to ask about anyone’s gender or sexual issues. I prefer not to know or care what a person identifies as. I don’t NEED to know what’s under their clothes and who they want to smooch today.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t know about that. I actually wrote some articles in the past on the future of ID technology.
      What prevents you from cutting other people’s thumbs and then pretending to be them? Or copying someone else’s fingerprint and then sticking it on your own?

      I, too, feel sometimes like I don’t want to know, but I am forced to know. How is that a part for a fight for acceptance?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Good point. But there has to be something bio, if not fingerprints.

        Yes, we are forced to know. It’s irritating. Now that I’m not dating, I don’t care what others get up to in the bedroom (or wherever), whether they’re straight, gay, or any other thing.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Usually I’m happy to fix the issue without thinking about the consequences.
    Because these are not in my hands. I don’t know what fate will be. And I know that if I fix an issue, it is because it was meant to be fixed. So the future/consequences are not up to me.

    I suppose that the airport security will become easier due to the modern tech. I’ve heard that the chinese people are surveiled almost 24/24. There are automatic cameras everywhere to see what what everyone does, if the camera sees something unusual it notifies an agent who go strait to the spot. Plus, the camera has taken all the info on the suspect so that he can be stopped even on another neighbourhood or town. Every chinese uses a sophisticated app that helps him to do lots of things with it including paying bills, paying his food on the restaurant…. It is with the same app that the government spies on his citizens.
    So if high tech such as this exists already, it is for sure that soon something similar will appear here. Hence no need for extra security at the airports.

    If a transgender uses his or her old Id card, it will probably be known.
    But nowadays it will be difficult to know, he or she will be surely taken as a thief. Maybe they shouldn’t have changed their gender in the first place.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. An interesting perspective. Thanks for sharing.

      The technology is very advanced and every aspect of our life is magnified and “out there”. But the truth is that most of the time this is analyzed AFTER some crime. It is too late then. Yes, some are being surveilled live, but it cannot be done for ALL.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. The whole gender thing befuddles me. It takes a male & a female to make a child or, if there is mitochondrial damage, a male & two females. This label factory nonsense that has started up only serves to confuse. And, honestly, I don’t care what gender you do or don’t identify with. Ditto skin color or genealogical connections. I’m more concerned with your integrity.

    Regarding, TSA…they aren’t keeping anyone safe. They are a constant reminder of our police state.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. I haven’t met anyone that has had a GOOD experience. Let’s see…long lines, gropings, scanner radiation (Chertoff is rich), a new layer of government bureaucracy, another tax burden… The only thing TSA has managed to do is harass us, not catch “terrorists”. Nothing but Bush Dynasty-created Police State.

        Liked by 1 person

            1. News Related Opinion Piece.
              I try to put the acronyms of categories at the beginning of the title so my audience knows whether it’s something they want to read, or not. I’m still just testing it out.



    I didn’t even think of travel. I don’t remember having to fill out a gender question. Oh, and gender refers to pronouns, not physical attributes. Lifting your skirt doesn’t have anything to do with what pronoun the TSA people use with you, it determines which toilet you use. I do NOT want anyone lifting my skirt (indeed if I ever wore a skirt, the press would have a field day! “Old Bat spends 90 minutes shoving herself into a skirt and pantyhose to go to the airport! More at 11:00.”) I am a follower of “Person of Interest” which is a TV show where a single machine has eyes and ears on EVERYONE! It was a fascinating show. We don’t have to live in a police state because we have Facebook and Instagram and Twitter where we tell indiscriminate numbers of people what we had for breakfast and take selfies everywhere.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. A link starting with “wordpress” does not work. You cannot copy the address from when you’re in your Reader. You actually have to go to that website and THEN get the actual address. Otherwise, I cannot read what you wanted to share.

      You cracked me up with the news about you wearing a skirt. “More at 11:00”!

      Indeed. We surely help those who keep an eye on us. While it can do some good (missing child found due to iPhone tracking), it’s mostly a terrible thing.


  9. This is a very interesting issue you present here. Maybe similar to how many reacted about the use of bathroom for transgender people. I’ll have to think about this! Thank you for the thought provoking post! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I guess i am a lot more old fashioned than what I want to admit, but this whole gender fluidity is a load of crap. I know I am going to get a lot of flack for my opinion, and I really don;t care. Biologically, there are only two genders, and your DNA doesn’t change, no matter what you do on the outside or how you “feel” on the inside. The proof is in the DNA.

    As always, a very good, thought provoking post. Keep up the good work Goldie. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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