NROP: What happens when we are given what we do not want?

Have you ever wondered what to get someone for a gift? 

Have you speculated what they might do with the said gift?

Did you ask them what they wanted to get?

Did you listen to what they had to say?

Have you ever received a gift that you did not like or enjoy?

Personally, I think I am the easiest person to get a gift for. Ever since I remember, puzzles and books were always my go-to answers when asked the “What do you want for your Birthday?” question. However, as I got older, I realized that I do not really care what I get. Sure, it is nice to open a thoughtful gift, but I have learned to do without them. The truth is that I do not need others to get me things. If I really want something, then I will get it myself. (If you want to buy me an island, go right ahead. I would not refuse it. But make sure it is nicely manicured and no wild animals live on it.)

Quite frankly, nowadays, I group the gifts I received into those that surprise me (those that unexpectedly hit the spot) and those that do not. That does not mean that I am ungrateful. What matters to me is the thought behind the gift. The fact that someone remembered about me. No matter what the gift is, I act graciously. Even if I flat out do not like the gift (i.e. I will never use it). I am aware that re-gifting is a thing, but I usually find myself torn about the prospect of giving away something that was meant to be for me. In order to help me appreciate what I get, my parents had a “no re-gifting” policy. And I somewhat stick to it. Even if I do not like it, I try to use it, because I feel bad for giving away something that someone spent their time and money to get FOR ME. And worst of all, I would be mortified if the gift would be re-gifted and ultimately returned to the original giver.

When it comes to buying gifts for others, I am the worst. I walk into a store, hoping that something will jump out at me, but more often than not, it does not. I walk around endlessly. Yes, I try to ask the birthday-boy/ girl-to-be, but oftentimes they say: “Nothing”. And then I am back to square one. Yes, I try to ask the people close to them, too. This can be hit or miss. Sometimes they know exactly what that person needs/ wants because they said so in the past. But, sometimes, they THINK they know what that person wants, but in reality, they are telling you what THEY think that person could use.

Gift-giving is hard. Do you agree?

However, I refuse to just give up and not care about it. Every now and again, we all need to feel special. And if we do not make an effort even once a year, then…

This was long enough of a prelude.

As you might have guessed already, today, I want to talk to you about gifts. The unwanted gifts, to be precise.

Several days ago, a 22-year-old male drove his brand new BMW 3 series into a canal in India. Unfortunately, there seem to be at least two conflicting stories on this one. A vast majority of the sources report that the young man sank the car intentionally. Why would anyone do that? Supposedly, it was because his parents are not good listeners. They bought their son a BMW when he explicitly told them he wanted a Jaguar for his birthday. It is said that the son complained about the BMW being too small and that he and his buddies would not fit easily in it.

All this is being disputed by the father, who supposedly claims that the son never demanded a Jaguar, that he ended up in the canal because he swerved to avoid an antelope in the road and that he has an undisclosed mental illness that impairs his judgment.

However, other sources claim that the father knew about his son’s preference, but did not give it much thought, since they were unable to afford the Jaguar and thought he would be fine with the BMW. While the BMW costs about 3.5 million rupees ($50,000), the Jaguar is priced around 5 million rupees ($70,000).

Eyewitnesses report that the male drove the car into the canal and once the water got deeper, he got out and then even tried to help others get it out of the water. It took a crane to pull the car out.

No one was arrested, obviously. However, I am surprised that no article mentions illegal dumping fines. Surely one cannot dispose of their car anywhere they want with no repercussions.

If you are from India, and/ or if you speak the language, could you let me know what the REAL story is? There are two videos with untranslated audio, and I wish I knew what they said. 

Police official speaking, starting at 0:47.

I do not know if anything said in the below video is relevant or not, but I am curious to find out who did the videoing. (For some reason, I am unable to embed that video, so please go to DailyMail’s site –> HERE <– to view the video)


Stay golden,



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30 thoughts on “NROP: What happens when we are given what we do not want?

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  1. If the guy in question intentionally drove that car into a canal, then I think he’s a 22-year-old baby. He reminds me of a kid I was unfortunate to meet last year.

    We abide by the same principles, you and I. The first and last birthday I celebrated was my first birthday. Don’t ask why. I don’t even know.

    I grew up used to not receiving gifts on my birthdays or for Christmas, so I pretty much stopped expecting them. For my fifteenth birthday, my dad surprised me with a birthday gift — a phone. He had hinted at getting me a phone some weeks before, and I’d also hinted at how perfect my life would be if I had an android phone.

    In the end, my dad got me a phone that looked like something out of a 1990 movie. Still, let it be known that I didn’t throw it into a canal just because I didn’t like it.

    Even after I saved enough money and bought my dream phone, I found it very difficult to part with my birthday gift.
    You see, I don’t care about the gifts I get. It’s the reason behind the gift and the thought that someone thinks I’m special — that’s what matters to me. That’s what makes me attach so much value to a gift that I don’t like.

    Which is why when I see KIDS like this guy (if he’s guilty) throwing tantrums over a birthday gift they don’t like, I wish I could run at the speed of light, so I can deliver sixteen slaps across their cheeks in a single second. A brain resetting slap — that’s what they need.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. “Still, let it be known that I didn’t throw it into a canal just because I didn’t like it.” That was funny. I’m proud of you, though.

      Brain resetting slaps… I think you are onto something. Why 16, though?

      I find it rather unfortunate that kids get everything whenever they want it on a daily basis that it’s hard to get something “special” for them for their Birthday. What can a kid want if they have a phone, a tablet and a drone by the time they are 7 (and often way before)?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m glad you found that part hilarious!

        Honestly, I have no idea. 16 was just the number that came to my mind. (Maybe my subconscious is trying to tell me something… Oooohhh)

        Quality time, maybe? That’s probably not what they want, but I think it’s just what they need (??). Truth is, I don’t know if there’s any material thing you’d get a kid for their birthday today that would REALLY make them feel special. You can’t get them a wristwatch for their birthday when you got them a video game the other day just because they finished their chores.

        It’s time we did something unorthodox. As for me, I’d rather you enroll us both in a one-day pencil art master class than buy me a laptop. Quality time trumps gift for me. I get that it’s not the same for others, but — but nothing.

        We’ll just have to figure it out as time goes on.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Maybe deep down you want to go back to when you were 16. Or maybe 16 was the worst time for you and you want to inflict that pain onto others. I like speculating like that. LOL

          But nothing. Either you’re on a roll today (in that case, Welcome back!), or I am just very easily amused today (could be…).

          Pencil art master class. Hmmm… Sounds really neat. Although I know I would be terrible. At least it would be FUNNY.

          One day at a time…

          Liked by 2 people

          1. I think it’s your first guess. Just last night, I was wistfully wishing I could be much younger with the knowledge that I have now. There are lots of things I haven’t done now. Things I planned to achieve at a younger age.

            This has escalated into something deep, hasn’t it? LOL. I’m fine.

            Liked by 1 person

  2. I totally agree. I love to give gifts but it’s so hard to decide what to. I like to give something useful too. Personally I feel it’s a lot more easier to gift the women species. It’s hard to decided what to get for the male species. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Speaking of gifts: I use to be really good but somewhere along the way I got really lazy. Now I let the wife buy the gifts. As for receiving gifts, I’m the kind of guy who buys things when I want them. When my birthday or Christmas rolls around I’ll save something on the side and hint the hell out of it.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Good idea! I will have to try and follow suit. But then you never need anything when you need to need it (B-day, Christmas, etc.). It’s usually months before or the day after. You must be a good planner.


  4. Well then, that is quite the story! An ungrateful child who doesn’t recognize the value of the product nor the gesture… I will probably never find myself defending his case with such a mindset, it just indicates that he has some issues to deal with in life…

    I too appreciate any kind of gifts, whether I wanted/needed it or not. The intention is all that matters and it’s already huge if they even thought of me without me reminding them of me… Then again, when someone decides to gift, I end up having a self-inflicted rule of getting something in return in the future, although I don’t expect others to get me anything if I get them something. Gifting is a pain in the a**! 😀 Great post!


    1. It’s true. I always hated the: “Now I have to get you something because you got me something” thing. Especially at work. I remember one year someone finally said that they are broke and they would much rather not spend money on something that others wouldn’t enjoy anyway, so we stopped with the gifts. Made my life so much simpler. Because the rule was – once you agree, don’t be an ass and get someone something, because it just makes them feel bad for not getting you something.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh my gosh. Imagine someone would give me a 50,000 dollar gift! Imagine even having that kind of money…….
    Gifts, I don’t know if I think it’s wrong to regift, it depends. I know I’ve often been given gifts that were pointless, though when I knew that the person had actually thought about it and tried, I didn’t mind that it was so off the mark for I was touched (then would still regift if I didn’t lose, like the ear-rings when my ears aren’t pierced).
    Thanks for the laugh…
    Love, light and glitter

    Liked by 1 person

          1. The first time it got infected and I couldn’t push the earring through and it was so new so it just closed plus I was way too scared to force it. The second time I got a back stuck in the ear and had to have it removed and was told to let it close for at least 6 months.

            Liked by 1 person

  6. It really does sound exactly like what a spoiled kid would do, and I can tell you there are a lot of spoiled kids out there. When I was 23, I was very mature — for a 13 year old. I think I reached 20 when I turned 35 and then went through a mid life crisis at 42. But never did I drive a car into a canal because I didn’t like it.

    Sometime during my preteen years, I told mom I wanted a fountain pen for my birthday. It was just after ball point pens came into fashion and she could only find one fountain pen in all the stores she looked`– the ugliest salmon pink monstrosity I’ve ever seen. When she gave me the pen, I threw it against the wall and told her it wasn’t what I wanted. She said nothing, just turned around and walked away (probably to prevent killing me). You don’t understand until later in life when you have teens of your own.

    Liked by 1 person

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Ellie Thompson

Poetry, Musings and Memoirs - True Tales of My Life

The Literary Serenity Archives

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