Negative experience part 1

Disclaimer: This is a negative post. No feel good story, no happy ending. So feel free to skip this post if you are not in the mood for more toxicity and negativity in your life. I will understand. I just HAD to vent. You do not have to read.

Normally, when I read posts complaining about other bloggers, I scratch my head a little. The person that is complaining includes a link to the blog they are complaining about, potentially increasing their enemy’s traffic and spreading their web (the more websites have your address on them, the better for you [SEO, etc.]). Because of that I will NOT include a link. After all, this post is to warn you, not make you go exploring.

I still cannot believe I am doing this (writing this post). Before you roll your eyes at me, let me explain. This is not my first negative experience on this platform. I have had some disagreements in the past. Sometimes we realized we wanted the same thing in the end, sometimes we agreed to disagree, and sometimes we realized that we both knew better and there was no convincing one another. However, every time that happened, it was warranted. It was a discussion. I disagreed with someone’s comment, or someone disagreed with mine, and so we talked. Disagreements are fine. I welcome them. Actually, I made some friends through arguing a little in the comment section. But this time… it was a whole different beast altogether.

I will keep it short – provide you with screenshots.

flowartstationdotcom is a page I recently started following, and I was enjoying it. I often left a comment and was replied to in a polite manner. Today, however, the post featured Diggie Vitt’s photography (you can just google it to see some examples), and …

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I will not try and defend myself by explaining to you my arts background. All I will say is that art is subjective. Everyone is allowed to like or not like a piece of art. No matter how much they studied it.

Am I missing something? What did I say that warranted such a reply? Insanely ridiculous on so many levels. I will leave it for you to judge. I will not pick it apart.

I just wanted to warn you that there ARE crazy people out there.

(This makes me appreciate the positive people in my blogging experience even more. It is a good reminder to not take good people for granted.)

Please accept my apology for posting something like this. I could not help myself. I had to keep it real. I HAD to share this with you.

Stay golden,

Signature.

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86 thoughts on “Negative experience part 1”

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    1. Thank you for assuring me that you’d be honest. I value that immensely.
      But yes, when I first read it, I could not stop but rub my eyes, thinking there must be some kind of “gotcha” moment in the end. But nope.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  2. It always amazes me when people immediately jump to the defense. Then get insultive. And then throw in that they are not responsible for your feelings. And then say go away. What has happened to civil dialog ????

    Liked by 4 people

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    1. Civil dialog. I like that phrase. Exactly.

      The amount of contradictions and totally off-topic offensive words towards me in that comment is ridiculous, but like I said, I’m not wasting my time on picking it apart.

      Liked by 1 person

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        1. I wasn’t sure whether I should. You know, the whole, don’t spread the negative energy type of thing. But I wanted to warn everyone, so that they are all prepared for when someone blindsides them like this. And I wanted to keep it real, too. It’s not just sunshine and rainbows after all. Thank you for understanding what it was all about.

          Liked by 1 person

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      1. I appreciate your vote of confidence.
        Blogging has been such a positive experience for me that I almost forgot that it’s for people, and people are imperfect. And conflict is unavoidable. Now I know for sure that blogging isn’t an idyllic land, which makes it real.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

    2. I laughed at your comment. Thanks for making me smile.
      Yea, in such cases I don’t even try and point out their faults, because they are too far off their rails. I politely bowed out. Their loss.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  4. When you deal with artistic people, you have to know that they get the negative critiques all the time. “I don’t know much but I know what I like…and I don’t like that…” or “What’s that supposed to be?” Or “They got a GRANT for that piece of &#^%$?” In this light, they tend to be a little defensive about any criticism and will try to nip it in the bud by putting the critic into a box with other illiterates and haters. You either love it, or you pretend to love it or you’re a moron, or a whiny child, or a Red Neck… It happens in Art, Dance, Music, Literature or the stage. I never answer the question, “What did you think?” at any artistic event. I reply, “What did YOU think?”

    When you said you didn’t think the latest shots were so great and didn’t know what to think, instead of educating you on the nuances of the artwork, you were labeled an art Nazi and relegated to the “Ignorant” box. You were expecting a discussion, the blogger was expecting an attack. The fact that they tried to shame you by incorporating foreign phraseology and name calling should have alerted you to the fact that the blogger, by his/her definition is the epitome of modern artistic values and therefore an expert in his/her own mind. If they truly were experts, they would try to engage you and answer your questions rather than berate you for your lack of knowledge. Had it been me, I would have replied in Russian or Chinese. But then, I’m a sorry old sot and tend to think in Klingon.

    Liked by 6 people

    Reply

    1. Thank you for such a detailed comment.

      The ending made me laugh. What a great idea. I considered doing something similar, but then I realized that it wasn’t going to go anywhere and I didn’t need toxicity, so I bowed out with a short comment.

      I found your first paragraph very interesting. I am a person who expresses their opinion freely. If I’m wrong, feel free to tell me why, but just because I said I was unsure about my feelings doesn’t mean I was whiny or not open minded, or discriminatory. Just utter nonsense.

      Truth be told, I viewed that post at work. In between this and that. I was short on time, but wanted to leave a mark for later. With art, I like to give myself a bit more time. To let it grow on me (if it can). So my plan was to study it more in-depth in the evening when I got home.

      I studied art. I’m not an expert, but I know this and that. While the author can definitely try and explain the nuisances to me, the last word is up to me (the viewer). No matter how much I read/ learn on the topic, I still have the right to not enjoy it as much as someone else.

      Also, the foreign words did not scare me, especially because their comment wasn’t in perfect English.

      Liked by 3 people

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    2. Right?
      I actually thought the same, so I went back to the post to look at all the comments. My comment was the only “negative” one, so the reply could not have been to anyone else.
      There still is a slight chance that you’re right, and it was a reply to someone from a different post. I await being proven wrong.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  6. I couldn’t see how your comment justified such a response. It was interesting in reading the long response that it seemed the responder was drinking a few glasses of wine and the more they drank the more emboldened they became. Art as another comment suggested is a subjective thing. No artist will please everyone and sometimes we are felt floundering as to what might be going on. You are entitled to your opinion.

    Liked by 4 people

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  8. 😶😶😶😶😶
    ……
    😮😮😮😮😮😮
    …
    😱😱😱😱
    …..
    😲😲😲😲😲😲
    ….
    😕😕😕😕
    …
    😒😒😒😒
    …….
    😠😠😠😠😠
    …..
    😡😡😡😡
    ……
    😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

    I can’t believe it !!
    Maybe he had a really bad day and you were the first he came up with.

    Please don’t give head to this absurd comment. Nasty people are out there. They shouldn’t upset you , I’m sure if you said so , it’s because you were right.

    Liked by 3 people

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  10. I was a bit afraid to google it, scared of what I might find.
    But this is exactly why I can’t stand modern art.
    It makes me so uncomfortable. It hurts my bones. It makes me nauseous.
    Once in a museum I literally had to puke.
    And I know that I am more sensitive than most people. But this stuff gives me such a strong reaction.

    Besides all that.
    I appreciate all honesty unless it’s said in a rude or disrespectful way.
    Since your comment wasn’t any way near that, I don’t understand why this person felt the need to write a 100 page novel as reply to you.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    1. “A 100 page novel” perfectly said. Made me smile.

      It’s rather hard to shake me up (explicit art, etc.), so that was not the case. I just have to either feel something when looking at it, and/ or see a deeper meaning behind it. If I don’t get that, I’m just not a fan.

      Thanks for sharing your experience. I had no idea an exhibit could have such an impact on someone.

      Liked by 1 person

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  11. To be honest, people can get upset over anything. I once said to some, you look tired today, and this person got so upset/pissed off at me, because apparently that means I called them ugly.

    In my experience (I know it doesn’t apply to everyone), artistic people can be really sensitive… At least the ones that crossed my path. For example, there was this art student that liked to do life drawing/painting and she was sharing it with people, when someone said, ah cool, but I’m not really into naked pictures. And this art person got very upset over that comment, almost as if it was a personal attack against her.

    Anyway, I think us humans need to learn to treat each other better. I hope venting made you feel better :).

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    1. I’m not easily shocked, but this whole ordeal took me by surprise, so I thought I should write about it. Yes, it made me feel better in a sense that people who read it felt a similar type of shock that I did.

      You’re not the first to mention artsy people being sensitive. I will have to think about that… Food for thought. The thing is that this person is a “curator”. The art is not theirs. I would understand it more if I critiques their personal pieces. But someone else’s? I guess they got offended, because they felt like I was undermining their credentials.

      And to close with your initial paragraph – yes, I notice that, too. People get offended about any little thing, even when it’s not meant to be offensive. I actually wrote a post in the past about it.

      Thank you for sharing your experience, your advice and support.

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      1. Hmm, yes I agree, it is possible they thought you were undermining them. I hope you don’t have another interaction like this. It’s never pleasant.

        No, thank you for sharing your experience. Whether it is good or bad, this platform should be a ‘safe’ place for you, and based on the comments, I think you have that :).

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

    1. It’s so nice to see an actual photographer/ artist’s take on that. Thank you. I definitely know you wouldn’t reply like this if I wasn’t a fan of one of your pieces.

      Like

      Reply

  14. Totally agree with your comment, and reactions. I have no interest in wasting my time with bloated egos/arrogance/narrow mindedness etc., and would have Unfollowed right away. That individual should really get some help with their attitude, or perhaps simply plan on a career change.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. I was a bit sad about unfollowing, because I almost never do so. Moreover, I actually enjoyed other posts, but since they told me to unfollow (so full of themselves), I was done.

      Like

      Reply

      1. Oh now I realise where I did the mistake. It should have been “rare us”. I guess I was half asleep when I typed the earlier comment 😂😂😂

        Liked by 1 person

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    1. Maybe. I guess what we call all learn from this is that if we have a bad day, we need to be cautious about taking it out on someone unrelated to the situation. It’s not always possible, but warning them about out potential outbursts does wonders.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  20. First and foremost I’m glad to see you are back. I missed your posts. I didn’t bother to visit the sight you shared here and I won’t. If that is how your innocent comment was responded to I want no part of it. It seems as if now days you can’t say anything without offending someone. Often I don’t even bother. Hope you have a great day 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    1. Thank you for such a warm welcome and for your support.

      Yes, I agree with the whole “can’t say anything without offending someone”. It really is sad. I used to never let go. Now, like you, I often don’t even bother. My health is important to me, and there is no reason to stress and lose it over someone who does not matter to us. But I don’t think it’s a good thing that everyone’s so sensitive and that we don’t “straighten them out”/ teach them.

      Liked by 3 people

      Reply

  21. I checked the site out, but the reaction to your comments were ridiculous. In my opinion the person has a massive chip on one shoulder or the other. There’s idiots all over the place it seems, and it’s a shame they’re on here. I’d just ignore it and move on. There was no need for the diatribe, you’re amongst friends here. Keep the good stuff coming!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  22. It must have been the way you said it ….. wrong font or something. Do you think that the individual in question has discovered that a lot of great artists are a bit unhinged and decided to convey himself (why is this individual male in my mind?) as unhinged in the hope that that act alone will make him an artist? He states somewhere there in the craziness that ‘Art is a language that can be learned’ …… I think he may be struggling with the reality that, no, actually art is a language that can’t be learned.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. You just made me laugh with the whole “unhinged artist wannabe”.
      But yes, of course, I accepted it that it was all my fault.
      My point exactly. Not everyone has the same taste, no matter how much they “learn”.

      Like

      Reply

  23. Those last two lines stink of hypocrisy!

    No room for judgmental people? The entire reply was judgmental. Open minds? Non-discriminatory? If the latest art craze was renditions of people taking a #2 on top of a clear coffee table, we have to accept that as art?

    Not a bats chance in a vat of guano.

    I believe the person who wrote that showed more about her/his character than any explanation.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. It was so full of contradictions it was ridiculous.
      I’m glad you saw it, too.

      I’m glad you now know that YES, you do have to not only accept it as art, but also like it.

      I just don’t like the trend of arguing without arguments, only armed with labels.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  27. I hate how people want to make the feel bad about themselves. People making people wanting people feel rubbish at blogging are just pathetic!🙄

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  28. Pingback: The end of 2018. On my terms. 2nd edition. – One day at a time…

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