Welcome to Act II of the hashtag week – #TuesdayThoughts.
[If you have missed #MondayMotivation, I suggest you go check it out here. I will let you in on a little secret – if you promise not to tell anyone – MondayMotivation is good on any day, not just Mondays!]
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One day, maybe even this weekend, when I get the chance, I will work on my Twitter account, which is linked to this blog. The account was started a few weeks ago, but I have not been able to remain consistent with it, which I regret. Its purpose is to share some Enneagram thoughts with the community. The Enneagram Institute came up with yet another personality test (Who does not love those?), which I took a few months ago. After doing so and learning of my “type”, I subscribed to a daily dose of wisdom, which is to help me boost my strengths and rid me of my weaknesses (or minimize them). Today’s thoughts are inspired by that.
In this blog post, I would like to ponder the tendency to repress my vulnerability and my connection with other people. My weariness towards human beings must have been planted in me when I was a young kid. Ever since I remember, my Father was a cynic, who always waited for the other shoe to drop. Because he always expected it to happen, he was always prepared and knew what steps to take to minimize the damage. Growing up, I was not aware of the psychology behind it, or even of the fact that I was adopting his trait for myself. Being in love with acting since childhood, gave me the excuse to act more often than not in my daily life. Being vulnerable meant giving people the chance to get to me, to hurt me, to use my weakness against me, so I put on a tough persona. It was on for so long that it became me, or better yet – I became it.
Throughout the years I have confirmed that there are malicious people in this world. Some are consciously malicious, some are ditzy, but malicious nonetheless. And that it is good to be prepared for the worst. However, I realized that building relationships with people is important, and that you cannot do that without being vulnerable. Not if you want REAL relationships, which are mutually based, anyway. So every day, I pick and choose the people I can and the people I cannot be vulnerable with, because it is a fine balance between being open and being gullible.
Do you find everyday vulnerability easy or difficult? Are you a trusting, or suspicious person? Do you know why you are the way you are? What caused you to be that way? Does being one way help you or impede you in your life?
Dare to be vulnerable today? With me? Share your thoughts, then!
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Lyrics for today are from the song “Live For Today” by the band – 3 Doors Down:
“And God only knows all the places I’ve been
But I love this life that I’m living in
I won’t look back to regret yesterday
Were not handed tomorrow so I’ll live for today
Another day and yet another’s done
Spending a life living within the past
I’ll take the chance before the chance has gone
You never know when it’ll be your last”
One day at a time... 
I was having a conversation with an old friend of mine the other day.
When I was very young (15 or so) she was in her late 30’s. I knew her since I was friends with her son and during hard times at home, when I needed a place to stay, she would always take me in.
Recently (15 years later) she began seeing a spiritual adviser. She also, since my young days, has been taking in people and friends in their times of need. This spiritual adviser told her how what she was doing was very kind but that very soon, on of these people was going to rob her blind. Because of this, she and I spoke, and she considered closing her charitable heart.
I tell you this because my responses to her was just like your thoughts on vulnerability. Anyone of the friends and people in your life could have hurt you, but they didn’t. And because of that you have friends, which became family, which defines life, love and meaning.
Anyone of those people she took in could have robbed her, but they haven’t. And because of that, people will forever be indebted and cherish her.
Will someone hurt you? Yes, probably.
Will someone in desperate times steal from her? Eventually, probably.
But it’s all about risk – or more so – about being open to the possibility of reward.
Bad things will happen either way, but good times – you have to be open for.
Great post Floatinggold! Thank you for sharing!
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Thanks for sharing your own story. There is evil, but there is also good and we cannot forgo it just to live in darkness.
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